calling all moms!
Calling all Moms, I say!
I ‘M calling all moms everywhere!
Let’s pop this cherry and talk some smack.
The shag carpet ensemble — the introductory welcome hug that you have long since been waiting for all day… along with that shot of sugar-free vanilla syrup to take that slight edge off the forty weight demitasse — The ‘A‘ to ‘D,’ the ‘E‘ the ‘F‘ and the ‘E-F.’ The locked door has never looked so juicy and grandiose to the unaided eye: the nylon pink shag carpets, mats, and tank sets – – all dressed with the look of Tweed, the everything–your-bathroom–needs regalia.
While we are here, let us give thanks to the waffle-textured latex-coated polypropylene that merely oozes the great GAUD of 1970’s, ‘Come Alive’ tri-tone couture, which oddly enough, exists as the backdrop for the chamber acoustics of an all-time ‘hill that always hums most westerly of Smithville’s most coveted Jubilee Rose ‘n Strum.
While this is how my sanctuary is vividly depicted in my mind’s eye.. others prefer the Farmhouse bath. I personally, in reality — indulge in the former as well. I’m a southern gal at heart, don’t you know.
This is not a case of the sequential #1 followed by sometimes the most … promising of number 2’s. This is more-so a pilgrimage in search of peace & quiet.
To us Moms, the porcelain throne.. the bathroom.. the loo.. particularly, the john is our ultimate sacred space .. our quiet place – our go-to sanctuary to seek out as well as to maintain our sanity.
There is nothing more precious in this entire world than our children: our greatest gifts, by far; but, it is also a job like no other on earth — the ultimate O.J.T (on-the-job training) experience for life. We don’t always keep it together; we don’t always have the answers; and we don’t always feel like we have the sufficient amount of energy, nor the emotional, mental stamina that it takes to make it through every single moment of each day.
This is our place where we can actually catch our breath and to breathe the first full breaths that we have taken since the beginning. This is our place to decompress.. to get a grip.. and to hit the reset button. I want to take it a step further.
I’m calling ALL MOMS EVERYWHERE — of all ages, from all backgrounds. I’m calling all Moms from every kinds of city. I’m calling all Moms from all kinds of suburbia. I’m calling all Moms from all kinds of in-between-theres … and Moms from the all kinds of beyond-the-further-over-yonders.
The Porcelain Throne is a new online community — a universal sounding board; an open mic for Moms everywhere.
This is your place to speak your mind — the real pretty, the real ugly, even the real.. eh.. Tuesday.
This is your place to vent. This is your place to blow off steam.
This is your place to release, and to just BE — without judgement. Society gives us enough shtick as it is.
This is YOUR place to be YOU.
The Porcelain Throne is our very own country club, our Diamond League. The Porcelain Throne is our very own friendly local neighborhood Tupperware chapter, and our very own tree house & Girl Scout troop. The Porcelain Throne is where we are each other’s cheerleaders — we lift each other up whenever anyone of us is down.
This is our place to unify and to celebrate. This is our place to learn and to grow.
The Porcelain Throne is a place for us to just go back to the basics of life – to just plain have FUN!
We get so caught up in being Moms – and rightfully so – we love our kids. We get so caught up in our every titles that we forget to go back to enjoying the simple stuff in life – like not taking ourselves too seriously. (That’s what ages people the most, don’t ya think?)
It’s okay to be silly! I like to think that our children help us out a great deal in that department. This world is only getting crazier, let’s revel in it together; however, on our own terms — according to what makes US happy first and foremost.
The Porcelain Throne is our place to just get FIRED UP about life, because we are more than just Moms; we are more than just our titles; we are more than just our relationships; we are more than just routine in our everyday lives — we are superhuman! We better start acting like we know.
The Porcelain Throne was created FOR every Mom … AT every stage. After all, MOM is forever.
Whether you are are a new mom — first and foremost — congratulations and humongous hugs; or, if you are a grandmother — first and foremost — congratulations and humongous hugs; to ALL Moms — first and foremost — CONGRATULATIONS AND HUMONGOUS HUGS, the Porcelain Throne is your stage.
Are you a Mom? Then, this is for you.
Welcome to the Porcelain Throne
What’s your story?
